One of the hardest parts of being an educator

One of the hardest parts of being an educator is losing a student, parent, or staff member.  I, unfortunately, had this happen way too many times.  And each time it was so difficult at so many levels.  

Last night on Facebook a wonderful parent at Gilbert El, posted that it has been 16 years since her son, Tyler, was killed in an automobile accident.   I will never forget that day.    Tyler was one of the sweetest kids in the entire world.   He was a in one of our multi-age classes at the time.  I believe he was a second grader.

I will never forget getting to school that morning and hearing this terrible news.   His classmates were so upset as were all of the teachers.  It is almost incomprehensible to try to explain this to young children.

I will also never forget his funeral services.   Several of his little friends sang a song and it was so very touching.   If he had lived, he would have probably already graduated from college because I know of several of the children in his class have graduated.

I lost touch with his mom through the years but thought about her often.  I knew she still lived close to Gilbert El.   Then one day I found out she had remarried and was pregnant with triplets. She had three boys.   A child can NEVER be replaced, but I was so thrilled for Donita to have three boys.

My last year as principal at Gilbert El the boys were in preschool. They were so cute!

When I came back and decided to run for the board, Donita and her family were some of my biggest supporters.   The boys were still at Gilbert El and probably in about fourth grade.    They took signs and helped put up  the big ones for me.   They posted pictures of the boys with my signs.    It was amazing.

Tyler was a wonderful little boy who touched the hearts of a lot of people. He will always hold a special place in my heart as does his mom and her family. I was devastated when this happened and don't believe that I did anything more than anyone should do in a time like this.  However, to have his mom do so much to help me get elected meant more than words can ever explain.

Unfortunately, this happened more than one time during my years as an educator.   As a principal, we lost children to  accidents and to cancer. We also lost several staff members.  It was always a very difficult time.  I remember thinking one time that the true definition of being a leader is to be the one who doesn't fall apart when everyone else is.   I always had to remain calm and help all of my staff, kiddos, and families get through these horrible times when my heart was breaking, too.

An Article My Mom Saved from the Mesa Tribune (3/12/79)

One of the greatest privileges I had as a teacher was having Wendy Aaby as a student.  I had her when she first moved to Gilbert in second grade and then when I moved to third grade, she was in my class.   Wendy was  paralyzed from the waist down after she had a brain tumor and the radiation she went through severed a spinal chord. 

Her mom was amazing.  She was so trusting of me as a teacher.  It was the first year I did my Bisbee/Tombstone trip and Marilyn (her mom) let her go with us.  Our wonderful health assistant, Mary Sisung, went along to tend to her physical needs. 

Wendy taught me so much as a teacher and she taught the students in my class so much about empathy and compassion.   Wendy died when I was in Douglas and I asked her best friend at the time, Charissa, if I could share about how amazing she was.  And she said yes.  Charissa is/was one of the kindest most amazing students I ever taught I feel privileged that we have kept in contact through the years.   She even helped with my campaign for GPS Governing Board.

When I came across this article, I was so touched that my mom had saved it.  I am sending it to Wendy's mom.

Students learn "lesson on wheels"

By Linda Schwartz
Staff Writer

Gilbert-There is no way Wendy Aaby could have felt alone.   

Usually she is the only student in a wheelchair at Patterson Elementary School but last week the second grader had company on wheels.

Using one adult-sized and one child-sized wheelchair brought to the school for the week, students and teachers took turn spending several  hours in the chairs.

Wendy's teacher, Sheila Rogers, came up with the idea to help Wendy feel more comfortable among her classmates and to give the other students an understanding of what it means to be confined to a wheelchair.

"It has been a positive experience for everyone involved," said Mrs. Rogers who challenged Wendy to what has become a frequent recess activity--a wheelchair race.   

Principal Leona Shreve was one of those who learned from her several hours in the chair.

"I found many of the things I had tried to get "Wendy to do were not that easy," she said.  "I felt very restrained because I wanted to  be able to do things quickly and I couldn't.   It has been an eye opener for the rest of us."

Several of Wendy's classmates said they enjoyed the wheelchair experience, although they complained of tired arms.

Maneuvering the chair over bumps and steering around corners takes considerable practice and strength.

Wendy's mother, Marilyn Aaby, said the child has been paralyzed for two years.   The spinal injury was the result of chemotherapy given Wendy, now 9 years old, following surgery for a malignant brain tumor.

Mrs. Aaby said Wendy has come home this week excited about seeing her classmates on wheels.   

"It has taken a long time to get used to the fact that she will never walk again," said Mrs. Aaby.

What a blessing it was for me to have Wendy as a student for two years.  I was so sad when she died at a young age.  And I will always be grateful for the lessons I learned from Wendy and from the fact that her mom trusted me implicitly with her education in all areas.   I was truly blessed to have Wendy as a student and Marilyn as a parent.   I learned more from her than she learned from me.  And I believe that the other students did, too.

It was such a privilege for met to be Wendy's teacher for two years!!

Kenny Chesney - While He Still Knows Who I Am - An Alzheimer's Tribute

This song speaks volumes to what Alzheimer's is all about.   It brings tears to my eyes when I listen to it.   The last two years with Teresa was so difficult.  I love the message.

Former resident selected as superintendent in Douglas (headline in Douglas Dispatch)

July 28, 2010

BY LARRY BLASKEY

DOUGLAS DISPATCH

After hours of interviews, a public forum and an additional executive session, former Douglas resident Sheila Rogers was selected as the district's new superintendent.

In a special meeting on Monday, July 26, the Douglas Unified School District Governing Board finalized a two-year contract at $105,000 annually.

Since 1989, Rogers has served as principal of the Gilbert Elementary School, and 38 years with the district.

In addition to her term as principal, she has worked as an interim personnel director, helped implement a classified and job description study and developed and implemented a district staff development program.

Earned Certificate

In 1989, Rogers earned her Principal/Supervisor/Superintendent certificate.

She has a bachelors degree from Arizona State University in Elementary Education with a Special Education certification.  She completed an additional 30 hours of graduate work in Special Education and earned a masters n Educational Administration and Supervision.

She has served as an adjunct professor at Northern Arizona University in Curriculum and Instruction, Educational Leadership since 2002.  

In 2005, she was selected as the Arizona School Psychologists' Administrator of the Year and in 2009 as the Gilbert Education Foundation Administrator of the Year.

She is a fourth generation Arizona resident. 

I also found a couple of cards that mean a lot to me.

#1

A couple of weeks ago, I read an article explaining that you had become the new Superintendent of Douglas Schools.   Congratulations!  What an honor!  They have picked an amazing leader and educator--you will be perfect for the job!

P.S.

I've been to Douglas before.  My third grade teacher took me there.  (I was her third grade teacher.)

Michelle (Jenkins) Miranda

#2

Dear Sheila,

Kerry just told me about your new position, and the move to Douglas.

I was very surprised and happy for you.  I guess you can go home--after all.  I hope your aunt is doing well.  She is such a sweet lady.

I hope all of your family is well.

I am really doing fine.   I will be 80 in September--and no complaints.

I think often of the years I spent working with you and all of the others  I felt really blessed to include all of you as friends.

I wish you much success and happiness in the coming years.

Pat O.

Pat was my aide at Patterson and Houston and then moved to Gilbert El. She was more than an IA.   She was an integral part of my classroom.   She was a dear friend.   She passed away in 2011 and I still miss her.  Ironically, her grand daughter-in-law is now teaching with Kerri.

The End of an Era! 1912-2017

I am writing this on Sunday evening and will post it at midnight tonight. Today the remainder of the furniture was taken out of the house.  The only thing left is the piano and it is being donated to DUSD in Teresa's memory.

There are so many people to thank who have helped me these past 2 plus weeks.   I don't know what I would have done without my wonderful former secretary AND DEAR FRIEND, Carol.  She has a lot of things that will remind her of us and I now have a bedroom at her house.   Victor from the DUSD came and moved things and took garbage.  He took some of the furniture and I had to force him to take money.    He helped us during the reunion and Teresa's 90th and helped me many times through the years.

I was able to see a lot of people I care deeply for but didn't get to see everyone.   I was really busy during the time I was there.   There are so many good people in Douglas and I will always value my time down there.

One of the most touching moments happened Saturday afternoon.  I took my favorite book, The Last Dance, over to the Hoyack's house.   Chuck, who was the Board President when I was hired in Douglas (and I have posted about this) died recently.  I was glad to be there for the funeral.   I just wanted to drop the book by, but they wanted me to come in.  So I was able to visit with Alvina, his wife and his two sons, Casey and Patrick.   We talked about many things but what really got to me was when they offered to come sleep in the house with me the last night I was there.   They are dealing with the death of their wonderful husband and father and yet, had the kindness to offer to help me.   That will never be forgotten.

Cecilia and Jay helped so much the first weekend.   Ken, Judy, Chris and Kerri came and got things that needed to be transported up.   Kerri came back this week and helped me.  I don't know what I would have done without her.

So today was the end of an era.   I locked the door and closed the gate for the last time.   Although it has been in our family since 1918, it is what I have called home for the last 68 years. It was so hard to do that and then drive away.   But I also need closure on it. 

Our grandparents moved to Douglas in 1912 and great grandparents to Bisbee in 1903.   So our family has been in Cochise County for 114 years.  However, even though it is the end of the era in Douglas, it is not the end of the era in Cochise County as we still have the cabin near Portal in the Chirichaus which is still Cochise County.  I don't foresee that ending anytime soon.

My car was filled completely and there was enough room for the pugs.  They love Douglas and the freedom to run around the front and back yards and bark their hearts out.  But like most dogs, they really want to be with the humans who love them.   And they will get time at the cabin to run free.  Just have to keep them away from the skunks!

I made it HOME to Gilbert with a few tears along the way.   My wonderful cleaners had two weeks without the house being dirty and they did a whole lot of extra things.  Cupboards were clean, the garage looks decent and it was nice to come home.   I have a lot of sorting to go through over the next few months now that Kerri and Cameron are gone.  But not for awhile. I am a bit burnt out in that department.

The one piece of furniture that I have always wanted was the desk in the hallway in Douglas that belonged to my grandfather.   Judy and Ken brought it last week and Kerri made sure it was placed in the entry way where I wanted it.   It was so touching to see this gorgeous desk when I first walked in the house.  I have  no idea how old it is, but it is still in very good condition.  Needs a bit of work, but nothing major.   So it was so great to come home and see it!

 
So tomorrow begins a new chapter in my life, which in itself seems weird after 68 plus years on this earth.   After I get some rest, I will need to figure out somethings to keep me busy.  I need to get back to my regular walking.  But the most important thing right now is to get some rest.

I am blessed with the many friendships I made in Douglas and I am happy to be back home in Gilbert with the many friends that I love.

Memories of 858

These pictures don't do the house justice.  I took pictures yesterday of what is now an almost empty house.    It is messy, but I decided it would be good idea to have some visual memories.

All Class Reunion-2017

This weekend is the all class reunion for Douglas High School.  They do these every three years.   During my time as superintendent, I attended two of them.   The ladies who are on the committee work tirelessly to put this together.

This year is also my 50th class reunion. Instead of having a separate one, it is part of the larger one.   

Last night they separated it into three places depending on decades.   I attended the one at the American Legion as that was where the class of 1967 would be.   I really like the idea of having multiple classes because it was nice to visit with friends who were both older and younger.

I walked to the Legion as it is about four blocks from the house.   I had a wonderful time catching up with many people who I have not seen in years.  It was also fun to meet some  of the people that I have gotten to know on Facebook.

It was really crowded and there were so many people to hug.  I wish I had more time to spend with some of them but it is hard with an activity like this.

I had only planned on staying a short time, but that plan didn't last long and I am glad that I was able to visit with so many people.

Tonight is a dinner and dance held at the county fairgrounds.  I am supposed to go with my friends, Tom and Sandra Sanders.     I am not sure yet whether or not I will go.   I have a lot to do in the morning in order to lock up 858.

Before I went, I was sitting in the almost empty house.  It was such a weird feeling to have only two chairs, a bed, a lamp and a few things that will be picked up tomorrow.

Tomorrow everything but the piano will be gone and so will I.  I will leave as soon as everything is picked up.   We are donating the piano to the school district and it will be picked up on Monday.   

It has been an emotional two weeks and it has also been physically exhausting.   Just going up and down the very steep steps is a work-out on its own.   

One of our cousins who lives back east asked me to take some pictures, which I did this morning.  The pictures don't do justice for the beauty of this old house.  With everything out, there is a lot of dust, etc.   Next week the realtor will have it cleaned and get it ready to put on the market.   

My hope is that whoever buys it will love it like our family did and take care of it.  My mom and Teresa took excellent care of this house and kept it up.   However, it is 103 years old.   I think that whoever buys it won't need to do a whole lot.  Probably painting everything will be a priority. 

The carpet is old and underneath are beautiful wood floors.  I think that they would look amazing if they were refinished.   

So as I sit here writing this and listening to music, I am thinking that I need to get a few things done in terms of throwing away trash and getting my own things together to leave tomorrow.  

We will see what the day brings.   As sad and hard as this has been, I am ready to be done and get back to my new reality.   

When I get home to Gilbert, I have some adjusting to do.  I won't have this hanging over me anymore and that will be a relief.  For the first time in my life, I am living alone.   I had a few weeks before I came down here and it was very nice.  I look forward to going through things at my house and getting rid of a lot of  "stuff," but that isn't going to happen for awhile as I am fairly burnt out in that department right now,

Since I retired in July, 2015, I haven't really had any down time.   When I first got back, I did some work for ASU, helped Judy with Teresa, and did some subbing as a principal. From June through November, I had Teresa full time and I couldn't leave her alone during that time. It was a 24/7 job and I am so happy that I was able to do that.  In addition, that was during the time I ran for the GPS Board so I was busy with campaigning.   When Teresa went to the group home, I tried to go every day to visit her,

In January when I was elected to the Board, it became almost a full time job.   These past several months while we were doing our superintendent search, I was still busy.   Now that we have our wonderful superintendent in place, I foresee that my hours are going to be far less.

So I will have some adjusting to do with time, too.   My one goal for the next month is to get back to walking and get rest as I am physically exhausted.   And I will have to adjust to being alone and not having "work" to do every day.

I worried a little about being retired and going from 60 hour weeks to nothing, but that certainly didn't happen in the two plus years.  It may now....   But I will figure it out.

As I wrote earlier, I am sad about selling this house.    However, I am ready to get back home and have this behind me.   Tomorrow it will be over. Monday begins a new chapter in my life and for the first time ever, I will truly have nothing I have to do other than the normal duties of a Governing Board member.