Post 1--COVID19

Today Kerri and I went to the Butte Farmer's Market.  There was an old white lady standing on the corner with a poster board sign saying "COVID is a lie."  It was the first time in my life I actually hoped that someone standing on a corner with a sign might be right.  However, it was just a hope as we are in the midst of the worst of times with this awful virus.

It is beyond anything I can wrap my brain around that this horrible disease has become political.  I have spent the last two weeks listening to teachers crying because they are afraid.  I have read comments on Facebook about this being a hoax and that face masks infringe on our rights (we do have to wear clothes).  I hate wearing a face mask, but I know that is what needs to be done right now.

I have had asthma for the better part of my 71 years on this earth.  I have spent time in the hospital through the years because my breathing was becoming a problem.  There was a period of time that I had a "thing" where I had to measure my lung capacity and if it wasn't at a certain level, I had to do something about it.  I have had a breathing machine that I needed to use to be able to breathe.  When I was a kid in Douglas, I remember when the smelter smoke would settle on the town and I could hardly breathe.  And at that time, we didn't have inhalers. I have LIVED not being able to breathe.

When I found Dr. Agren (and now Dr. Farrel) in about 2008, I got a new lease on life with the treatment from the Scandinvian countries that has basically "cured" my asthma and I have been able to lose weight, exercise, and lead a full life.

This has been a very difficult few weeks for me.  I have had to listen to teachers crying because we haven't made a decision about opening schools.  I have had words with people I care about which is so absolutely disturbing to me.  I have contemplated resigning from the board because I can't be a part of making a life or death decision. I am so distraught that this has become political and we have to find a way to make this decision in a strategic way. I understand this at a certain level, but how is preventing death a strategic decision?

I dealt with too many deaths as an educator.  I will always remember having to go to a classroom and tell children that their teacher had cancer or had died or that a student was killed over the weekend. It happened too many times. 

I have to figure out how to not be so passionate and how to not take this personally.  That is my problem and that is why writing is important to me.  

This is just post #1.  I know that I don't have many people who read what I write, but that is okay.  I can still write and maybe someday someone will go back and read what I wrote about.   

I have always believed that hope is the single most important part of life, but right now that seems to be a hard concept because there is way too much division on something that we should be looking at science and not emotions.