A few weeks ago I found out that a good friend had died after a short battle with cancer. Like so many friends, life gets in the way and you don't see or talk to them for long periods of time.
I met Beth when I had her daughter, Charissa, in my third grade class and then her son, Ricky, a few years later. She was a great mom for a teacher to have for so many reasons. So not only did I appreciate all that she did as a mom, she became a friend. That is one of the things I love about Facebook. It allows you to reconnect with people who mean a lot to you and Beth and I reconnected. I also connected with Charissa and Ricky who I taught in the 80s. They were both great kids and I was fortunate to have them in my class. Below is the message I sent and their reply. I will always cherish it because to me this is what being an educator is all about.
From me:
I just wanted to tell you how sorry I wasn't there on Saturday. I don't know if you know this or not, but I have also been fighting cancer for three years now. I have had a reccurrence and am going for a trial of a new drug. I have spent most of the last two weeks at the clinic undergoing tests, etc. to see if I qualify. For the most part, I have done well, but it has been taken its toll. I received a blood transfusion Friday afternoon and I felt fine and was sure I was going to be there. Saturday morning when I got up, I just couldn't get going. I want you to know how much your mom and family has meant to me. When I first had you in my class, Charissa, I was a fairly new teacher. I had taught special ed previously but that is different. At Patterson in those days, we had some of the most influential families in Gilbert. My class had a lot of very involved moms which is a good thing, but can also be difficult. The same with you, Ricky (and I still get to call you that). Your mom was so supportive and helpful to me. She gave me confidence that I was a good teacher. Of course, you both were easy students to teach but that was because of both of your parents. I wish that I had taken the time to tell her this but I am hoping telling you makes up a little bit for that. I will always believe that your mom and her support, humor and friendship, helped me to gain the confidence to go on and do all that I have done in my career. A good teacher learns from books, experiences, etc., but also from the different students and the parernts. Your mom taught me that having a parent like her who was very involved was someone I learned from. She meant a lot to me and we became friends. I also loved your dad. He was always involved when we needed him. And both of you will always be two of my all time favorite kids--I know I am not supposed to have them, but I can honestly say a most of my kids were my favorites and I was so fortunate to have so many great kids and families. But the Chafeys will always be up there at the top of a list if I had one. One of the highlights was getting to be a part of your own kids graduation a few years ago. I am so sad that cancer took your mom way too young. It is such a horrible disease and it doesn't care who you are. If there is ever anything I can do anything for either of you, please don't ever hesistate to get in touch with me. I am hoping I get accepted for this trial and then there are some positive results. I just wanted to explain to you because you mean so much to me.
From Rick:
Thank you very much, good luck with your battle as well. Stay positive and driven it so go a long way. Sorry we did not get to see you. Your thoughts and memories are very helpful. As well if you ever need anything, both of us are close and happy to be there for you.
From Charissa: Thank you so much for the kind words! I hope you are able to be a part of the trial and that it makes a difference and hopefully you have great results!
Our mom loved you too and cherished your friendship!
I will tell you that I definitely had a favorite teacher and you were my favorite! We were both so lucky to have you as a teacher when we were young but also to have you in our lives throughout the years
Relationships like yours make Gilbert still feel like the small town/family feel we grew up with
Please reach out if you need anything!
Xoxo
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