Sunday, May 11, 2008

Rest in Peace, Our Mary

Mother's Day in Mexico is always celebrated on May 10. Yesterday was the funeral for our Mary. It was fitting that it was on this date. Mary was like a mother to Judy and I. I have written about this on previous posts.

Patrick, Teresa, and I went to Douglas after school on Thursday. Kerri, Cameron, Judy, Ryan, and Kayla came down on Friday. Patrick, Teresa, and I went over to Consuelo's on Friday morning to see the family and find out if there was anything we could do for them. Consuelo had asked Patrick to be a pall bearer. She chose one member from each of her brothers' and sisters' families to be a pall bearer, along with Consuelo's and Patty's husbands. Patrick was very honored by this and I was very touched. It meant so much to be a part of this. Judy was asked to give the eulogy.

My cousins, Cecilia, Jay, and Yaya, came down on Friday afternoon. I know that they wanted to be there, but it meant so much to me. I am sure that Teresa and Judy felt the same way.

The rosary was on Friday evening at St. Luke's Church in Douglas. It was all in Spanish and there was a wonderful band playing Mexican music. Her coffin was closed at her request. We were able to see her in the afternoon. Patrick and I took Teresa and I thought she looked beautiful. She had looked so bad the last several months. I was not sure I wanted to see her that way, but it was important for Teresa.

The funeral on Saturday was all in Spanish. I was so proud of Patrick as he walked down the aisle with her family. Judy did an incredible job on the eulogy. The priest translated for her family members who do not speak English. She said something about each of her brothers and sisters and talked about how much she meant to us and what an incredible person Mary was. There was a large crowd at both the rosary and funeral. We sat with the family which also meant so much to me. The same band played at the funeral and the music was so uplifting.

One of the things that Judy said that I really felt described Mary's life was it is not the duration of your life that is important, but the donation of what you do with that life. Mary's donation will last forever!

Teresa had offered Mary a place in our family plot at the cemetery. There was one plot left after my grandparents, my Uncle Johnny, my mom, and one reserved for Teresa. Mary wanted to be buried there and her family felt the same way.

Teresa has a man who takes care of the grave and she had called him to make sure it was in good condition and it was. Everything looked so nice.

When we got to the cemetery, the chairs for everyone to sit were right over my mom's grave. I am sure that was hard for Teresa. It was for me. Cameron and Consuelo's grandson sat in a chair next to Teresa. At one point, I saw Cameron kiss his "Great's" headstone. During the graveside service, he traced over her name. Patty, Mary's niece, spoke about some of the things that Mary said in the months and weeks before she died. One of the things that she said which made me know how well she knew me was how quiet I had been when I was around her. She knew how hard this has been for me. I am not normally quiet!! She also said something about Patrick and Kerri. Patrick said later he always remembered her saying to him, "Patricio Timoteo!!!" There was another group of musicians who played at the grave site. Mary loved music and dancing.

We went to Consuelo's after the funeral. They had tortillas, beans, barbecued steaks, menudo, and drinks. It was a celebration of Mary's life with so many relatives and friends. We had a wonderful time reminiscing. Cameron and Kayla played with all of the children in the front yard. When it was time for us to go, Kerri, Cameron, and Kayla stayed. They all had a wonderful time. Kerri went out with all of the cousins and said how much the family reminded her of ours.

I have said how much Mary has meant to me in my life and how much I have learned from her and cherished about her. I know how hard it will be to go to Douglas and not have her there. I feel strongly that her family will continue to be a part of our family and I will do everything I can to make sure that happens.

Today is Mother's Day in the U.S. We didn't celebrate it much because of everything that has gone on in the past week. I can say that I am privileged that I have had "THREE" mothers in my life--my mom, Mary, and my wonderful Aunt Teresa. Not many people can say that!! I am truly blessed!!

Here is the obituary from the Douglas Dispatch:

Maria S. Berumen

September 30, 1931 - May 5, 2008

Ms. Maria S. Berumen, 76, of Douglas, passed away Monday, May 5, 2008.

She was born September 30, 1931 in Pirtleville, Arizona.

Maria was preceded in death by her parents, Jose and Santos Berumen, brother Margarito Berumen and sister Josefina Olivares.

She is survived by two brothers, Jose (Carmen) Berumen of Douglas and Lorenzo (Leonor) Berumen of Oracle, Arizona; two sisters, Consuelo (Beto) Galaz of Douglas and Adelaida (Chato†) Lovio of Tucson, Arizona.

Maria is also survived by 11 nieces, 17 nephews and lots of friends and family.

A Rosary for Maria will be recited at 7:00 p.m. on Friday, May 9, 2008 at St. Luke’s Catholic Church. A Mass of the Resurrection will be celebrated at 1:00 p.m. Saturday, May 10, 2008 also at St. Luke’s Church with father Arnoldo Noriega officiating. Burial will follow at Calvary Cemetery under the direction of Brown Page Mortuary. Pallbearers who will serve are Robert Lovio, Andres Berumen, Betito Galaz, Mark Berumen, Lorenzo Berumen, Jr., Patrick Rogers, Eddie Gonzales and Jason Cole.

Another PS to this blog:

The pictures at the top are Teresa and Mary from a typical day at the house. I am not sure when it was taken, but most likely in the last five years.

Patrick is all dressed to be a pall bearer.

6 remarks:

Kerri said...

I agree about the "Three," but for me it was more like three GRANDMOTHERS. I want to say that everyone loved Mary & that her family is ours and I hope we all keep in touch.


Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for sharing your weekend with all of us. Even though it was so difficult, everything sounded just beautiful and what a wonderful tribute to dear Mary to have all of you there. What an honor for you Patrick to be a pallbearer . . . I know you did that well. All of your words were so touching Sheila and it made me want to be right there with all of you. Judy always does such a great job speaking and I was really missing my sweet Kayla. I was touched Kerri that your mom's three moms were your three grandmothers!!!! You DO have a wonderful family. I know that as we age we appreciate family more and more! I'm glad you all have each other.
Love & hugs, ~ Nancy

velvet brick said...

Reading the words and all of the love between the lines only exemplifies the love that you and your family have for each other, Sheila. No one is ever lonely in your family. What a wonderful tribute to Mary and her impact on all of your lives. We should all be so lucky to have so many help celebrate our life and be there for each other when it is our time to go heaven-bound. Thank you for sharing, as always, your family and your heart.

Cheela said...

Nancy and Carol,

Thanks so much for your comments on the blog. I really appreciate it!!!

Anonymous said...

"What a Wonderful World" and tribute to one of the favorites, Mary. She lives on in your heart and happiness. Your families are fortunate...and growing. The roots are so strong.

Anonymous said...

I only hope Mary's family can hear the beautiful and loving words you have written about dear Mary! What a lovely tribute to a very special lady!
Ella era una mujer tan buena!